So, I’m a jerk. Last week, I blogged that I was sure I was going to get laid off that day. And then I didn’t tell you whether or not it happened.
It didn’t happen. I’m still waiting for the shoe to drop. Every day I go to work, I wonder if today will be the day. As I type this, I wonder if today will be the day. What is she waiting for, already? Doesn’t she know that I hate wondering? So, I wait and I wonder and I worry.
And now I have more to stew about. Yesterday, I had a job interview. The job could literally change my life and the life of my children.
And I have no idea how it went.
I mean, I think it went well, but I have no idea what he thought, nor do I know what he thought of the interviewee he had before me. He gave no clear signs, and I’ve had interviews before which I thought had gone well, but ended up not getting the job. So, I wait and wonder and worry.
Did I mention this is disrupting my sleep? I know, I know. I claim to have so much faith in my Higher Power. If I’m supposed to get this job, I will get it. I just need to know that if I don’t get it, it means there’s a better one coming along. I need to relax and hold tightly to my faith that it will all be okay.
That’s so easy to say!
Every minute that passes, I stress just a bit more. If I drank, I would probably drink myself into oblivion tonight just so I could sleep and not be up, fretting. Instead, I get to wander through my days, basically helpless in the path my life is going, sleep deprived and stressed.
- Posted in: Uncategorized