I Quit!

Seriously!  (Mother, don’t read this next part).  I’m having one hell of a night!

During the day, I basically came to the realization that I was probably at the bottom of Mr. Wonderful’s list of women.  I quickly became okay with that.  And then my daughter’s father said that he wants her and he’s going to do whatever it take to keep her from me.  I was having a much, much harder time dealing with that – the fear, trying to figure out how to handle it, etc.

And then, (if you’ve read my previous post, you already know) my daughter tells me that she doesn’t want to live with me – that she feels she can achieve health better in a home with an alcoholic, emotional abuser, and drug addict than with me.  Yah – not my best night ever.

So, I go on Facebook to complain about how distraught I am.  Mr. Friend from Junior High responds by offering to come over so I can cry on his shoulder.  At ten o’clock at night.  And he chats with me for a while, helping me feel better.  And we set a date to get together.  Just the idea of company helps me feel even better.

In another window, I’m chatting with Mr. Wonderful, who is being… well… wonderful.  (Mother, avert your eyes).  Damn him!  And at the end of our conversation – what does he say?  “Love ya babe.”

Seriously?!  Seriously?!  He says that tonight?!

What in the world am I supposed to do with that?  As if I don’t have enough things screaming inside of my head to keep me awake – he had to drop that bomb?!  Now, my stupid little girl mind is wondering, “What did he mean by that?  Was that one friend patting the other’s hand?  Was it a confession of love and the easiest way to sneak it in there?  Was that what he thought I wanted/needed to hear?

ARGH!!!  That was the last thing I needed tonight!

Men are stupid!

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