Tests are STUPID!!!

Oh, don’t get me wrong – I’m not upset because I failed.  In truth, I passed with flying colors.  I did so well, in fact, that they invited me to come back tomorrow to take the next level of tests (both my speed and my score were far above average).

Oops.  Getting ahead of myself huh?  I just took a test at the local school district so I could apply for an administrative assistant test.  Actually, I took three.  The first was the dumbest of all.  They literally gave me pen and paper and a calculator do to math.  Seriously.  It was pathetic!  Granted, some of them were story problems, but I mean really!

The second was in Microsoft word.  Can you believe I missed the Macros question?  I blame it on the version.  I mean – each version is so different and I haven’t really played in that version much!  Anyway, so I missed 3 of 30 questions (I didn’t miss the things like “Cut the selected text” and “Print the page” and “Undo the last action performed”).  Duh!  So, I whizzed right through most of the questions (three caught me up, obviously) and then took the third – Excel.  I was worried, but shouldn’t have been.  “Rename the worksheet”  or “Merge and center selected fields” or things like that.  Duh!  Again, I got caught up on three, but no biggie.

So, now I have to study for the next test.  Again, in Word and Excel.  It just so happens that I signed up for e-learning in Word and Excel just yesterday!  What are the chances?!

But I digress.  So, tomorrow, I go back for the next tests.

WHAT IN THE WORLD FOR?!

How will knowing whether or not I can insert text into a table tell you whether or not I can successfully screen your calls for unwanted solicitors and take thorough notes?  Will my ability to use Mail Merge tell you that I have a perfect balance of friendly and professional, while always being cheerful?  Just because I can perform tasks in certain computer programs in no way means that I am capable of being an administrative assistant!  There is so much  more to that job than cutting and pasting!

Sure, I’m capable in those programs, but that’s not what makes me good at my job.  Why can’t they test how amazing my phone voice is or how quickly I learn new skills and tasks?  I would rather have them test my dependability and punctuality than my Microsoft Office Suite knowledge.  It all just seems so arbitrary!

I guess I should be happy, right?  I mean I passed the test.  I’ve passed lots of them.  And yet I’m still unemployed.

You know the test I wish they’d all administer?  The one where they call my favorite boss and ask her about me.  That way, they could hear from someone who has known me for years where my strengths and weaknesses are.  They would have a better, over-all picture of who I really am and whether or not I’d be a good employee for them.

That test makes the most sense to me!

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