Not That Desperate

So, anyone who has read my blogs knows that I am overweight. However, that does not mean I’m desperate. I do single very well, so I’m not so lonely that I’m going to accept someone who isn’t worthy of me. Nor will I beg or demean myself in any way.

I’ve done the settling thing and I’m not going to do that again. I’ve e-mailed people who I’ve since stopped e-mailing due to some inherent flaw which I simply don’t want to have any part of (negativity, controlling, etc.) I have worked hard to become the best person I can be (it is an active, ongoing process) and I deserve to be with a good person. Just because I’m fat doesn’t mean that I have to put up with someone who is mean simply because nobody else wants me. As I’ve recently seen – I’d rather be alone than be with the wrong person.

Nor will I belittle myself. There are a few people with whom I’ve had great online conversations – one in particular. I’ve e-mailed him, letting him know that I’d love to get together with him, citing that it’s so easy to get along with someone online, but in person can be very different and I’d rather find out sooner than later if it’s a good fit. His response? “I know what you mean.” That’s it. He didn’t say, “Yah, that’d be great!” or anything like that. A part of me want so badly to continue contacting him. I mean, every time I e-mail him, he responds. Unfortunately, it’s never with much enthusiasm. Is he responding to be polite or because he’s interested? Either way, I’m done being the one to chase him. I’d like to have someone show some interest in me. So, I figure, if he’s interested in me, I’ll allow him to contact me. If not, he wasn’t the right one for me anyway. (Yes, I did watch “He’s Just Not That Into You and learned valuable lessons).

So, I’m back to not having anyone contacting me again. It’s not as much fun and a little more lonely, but I’m okay with it. My son comes home soon, so I’ll probably be too busy to date, anyway.


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