Monthly Archives: May, 2022
Confidante
Dear Reader – in all of this, I haven’t really mentioned D. Yes, I’m dealing with a bunch of hard stuff right now. Yes, I’m struggling on a number of levels. And yet, he’s there. Always. He listens when I just need to grumble (or yell. or cry.) He might not know exactly what do …
Phew!
I received some news yesterday which eased a lot of one type of tension. EL moved! I’m fairly certain he’s cyber-stalking me, but I was afraid he might have been trying to find me in real life to stalk me in person, too. I always had a niggling fear that he would find out where …
Gardening is Good for My Soul
I recently told you that I had a professional come in to take care of my garden during this time of stress. I didn’t tell you everything. I didn’t know why, but my starts were dying. I thought they were being eaten by something, but I wasn’t sure what, nor did I want (or have …
More Apologies
Dear Reader, are you ready for some back story? Sit back and relax. When I was a kid, a girl moved in a few houses down from me, and she was in my class. She was trying to bust in on my small group of friends that had been established for a year. She was …
Apologizing to my Son
I don’t know why, but I thought of some things today that really bothered me. The first one was at the beginning of my relationship with EL. We had been dating just a month or two, and we went on a camping trip with my family. Two things are stuck in my memory from that …
Better Boundaries
Dear Reader, I’m really, really proud of myself right now. This old dog is learning new tricks! With all of this stuff that I’m going through, I’ve acknowledged that I’m struggling (which is a pretty big thing for me.) I’ve also set boundaries, asked for help, and I made my needs a priority. Look at …
Just Like Her
Oh my heavens, Dear Reader. Do you journal? That’s part of the reason I blog – to be able to look back at who I was and what was going through. And maybe, just maybe, see some growth. Today, I noticed that someone read my blog called, “Weddings are Stupid.” I didn’t remember what it …
Spoon Theory
Dear Reader – have you heard about Spoon Theory? If you haven’t, it’s basically a way to describe the overwhelming fatigue someone who lives with chronic illness is dealing with. In a blog titled “The Spoon Theory,” Christine Miserandino describes how she showed her friend what it’s like to have lupus. (The autoimmune disease often causes fatigue, fever, and joint pain, …
Not all have NPD
This past weekend, D and I were talking about the abuse I’ve endured. We were trying to define some of it. I know that EL molested me. I know that other men have abused me sexually. Is that necessarily molestation? I guess I don’t know where the boundaries lie. It got me to thinking about …
publicinhiding 